“Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and
clamor and slander be put away from you, along with all malice. Be kind to one
another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.”
Ephesians 4:31-32
Bitterness can cause all sorts of trouble. When
you have bitterness in your heart because you have not truly forgiven someone, it
creates a stronghold for Satan in your life. When you have that stronghold, it
makes it even more difficult to do the right things and makes it difficult to
truly love each other. Holding a grudge against someone holds you back from
what you can do for God.
Sometimes bitterness can come up in
relationships, even the ones where you think everything is all put together.
When someone gets hurts, it can sometimes be hard to truly forgive that person,
especially if they have not taken the time to come before you and sincerely
confess and apologize. And when you do not forgive, bitterness begins to take
root. Forgiveness is an important thing.
“Bearing with one another and, if one has a
complaint against another, forgiving each other; as the Lord has forgiven you,
so you also must forgive.” Colossians 3:13
God says we MUST forgive, not we should, or we do
not have to, but we MUST!
A few times in our relationship Noah and I have
hurt each other. Not intentionally or because we do not belong together, but
because relationships are a growing and learning process, and when you put two
sinful human beings together who work in different ways, conflict will arise. A
mark of a good healthy relationship is not having no conflicts, but knowing how
to handle conflicts, and that is something that has to be learned. It does not magically
happen because you two were “meant to be together”. It happens because you
learned through hard work how to work together. There were times early on when
Noah and I did not know how to handle our differences and did not know how to
handle conflicts and that led to us hurting each other. Though we apologized after
it happened, we did not truly forgive each other and we moved forward with
bitterness growing in our hearts.
It was not until a few weeks ago that we
addressed the issue of bitterness. Praise God for the godly counsel that He
places in our lives!! God placed a very wise person in Noah’s life who
encouraged him to sit down with me and to talk about our bitterness that we had
towards one another and to release that to God and to truly forgive one
another. We then decided to take the time to go through this hard, but
incredible process
Noah and I explained to each other what we had
been bitter about and asked each other for forgiveness for having that
bitterness. We then prayed and asked God to release that bitterness and anger
from us and to help us to truly forgive each other. After that we asked each
other and God for forgiveness for doing the things that caused the bitterness
in the other. It was the most amazing, healing experience I have ever had in my
life! When you let go of bitterness in your heart, it is such a freeing experience!
It is like a weight is lifted off of your shoulders! That stronghold for Satan
is gone and you can now do more easily the things that God wants you to do.
That means that you will be much more willing to take the effort each day to be
loving.
Since me and Noah have had that experience,
things have not been perfect, but God has been able to do so much more with us
and through us. It is so much easier to get up in the morning and to choose to
love Noah without that bitterness blocking me. It is much easier to forgive him
for the little things that may bother me. And it much easier to respond to his
loving actions.
If you are harboring feelings of bitterness then
I urge you to spend time with the person you are bitter towards and confess
those feelings of bitterness, to them, and to God, and spend time seeking
forgiveness and the ability to truly forgive. The person does not have to be
someone you are in a romantic relationship with. Maybe it is a sister or
brother, mother or father, step parent, or someone else who has hurt you in the
past. Whoever it is, let go of your bitterness towards them! Do not let the
bitterness continue to grow!! Do not let Satan have that stronghold in you!
I hope that this will touch your heart and that
if you are experiencing the burden of bitterness that you will get to
experience the healing that comes from releasing it.
“For if you forgive others their trespasses, your
heavenly Father will also forgive you, but if you do not forgive others their
trespasses, neither will your Father forgive your trespasses.” Matthew
6:14-15
I love you all and God bless!
Gabby J
